Building better relationships – tips from the couples therapy couch
All relationships go through their ups and downs and with the festive season upon us often tensions build and issues surface to be resolved.
The following is a list of things you and your loved one can work towards when miscommunication happens and to prevent hurt from becoming something bigger.
Resentment is an avoidant mechanism for unresolved hurts/perceived or real.
Get together with your loved one and step through the list to see if you can agree to the following to help give a voice and clarity to what might be the resolution/s:
1) A safe space to talk about what stops them from speaking up when they get hurt
2) Respectful active listening – without justifications or blame
3) Reflecting on what the other says and mirroring back what was heard for clarification
4) Acknowledging the hurt / anger / miscommunication
5) Brainstorming what needs to happen so this doesn’t impact their relationship on an ongoing basis
6) Rupture is an opportunity for redefining the boundaries of the relationship
7) A good relationship is about having each others back and being someone of trust
Take some time to think that through and enjoy the rest of the holiday season wrapped in greater love and connection.
Be kind to one another
Vanessa
